Today, not a whole lot is going on, so obviously I've been thinking. Oh, but am I not always? Some days I want to waste away in the agitating thoughts that come to my mind, others I just want to float away on the inspiring ones.
Lately, all of my thoughts have been nonetheless, aggravating, tiring, repetitive, stressful... Beating my brain against the wall of my skull, trying to motivate me to do something with myself, when I don't feel ready. Why must they always be so condescending? It's like I'm turning on myself, I think. Which probably makes me sound kind of crazy. Well, you know me.
It's not exactly one's goal in life to be far from career focused at the age of 20. What's even worse is being far from knowing what that career is. There are just so many things I'd like to do with my life, but I'm just wasting my time, picking one.
Not only do I feel like I'm wasting my time on ideas, but I'm wasting my mind away to my constant nostalgia. Blah, it's like I can't escape my childhood, because I don't want to let go of that comforting feeling.
One thing I know for sure is that no matter what I choose to do in life, I'll always have a strong support group, without which my strong backbone would break, whichever way I decide to move. I love my family, friends, and my great boyfriend more than life.
All I know is one day I'm going to look back on my life, and I'm going to have one of two feelings, regret or accomplishment. It's too soon for regret. So I'm going to choose what I know, and carefully pick that choosing, Take my time, but be careful about it, because time will not wait for me; I have to learn to keep up with time, or in the end, I'm going to wish I had.